Confessions of a new dad, vol. 30: Mobile mayhem

Mood music: The Who, "Going Mobile"

Getting ready in the morning, lounging around in the evening, preparing a meal... well, just about everything has changed now that our little Miss K has gone mobile. (Thanks Pete and Roger, I'll take it from here.)

Time was we could leave our little girl snug on the couch for second or two in the boppy, with little fear of her rolling off or causing any sort of calamity. Then when she started rolling over, the couch became off limits as a means of her minding herself. But she fit every so nicely in on the carpet, or in her little play gym. If she did move, it wasn't far and she had all she needed to keep herself entertained with dangling toys, not to mention her fingers and toes. Then rolling over turned into rolling and tumbling- a true means of transport. It may have taken her a while, but she could get from point A to point T(rouble) if she wanted to. But the grunts and sometimes little yelps that accompanied the little tumbleweed were alarm enough to know that she was on her way to no good- and in enough time to scoop her up or change her course.

Well, when the tumbleweed joined forces with the "army crawl" (using her arms to pull herself along like a soldier in the field) it spelled the beginning of the end of, let's call it, normalcy. Now she was able to get around a little swifter and quieter- opening her eyes to things all around her, now that her head was somewhat forward while she puttered along. Such as her feline brother Mickey Mantle, who was at once intrigued and terrified by the slow-moving mass coming towards him. It was during this phase that my candidacy for Parent of the Year hit full swing, when I happened to snooze for maybe two minutes one morning while "watching" her, only to find when my eyes opened that she had moved deftly across the room and pulled over the basket in which we keep (see also: kept) our cell phone chargers, with wires aplenty attached- and plugged in, mind you. So my POTY candidacy really did take off you see, what with the risks of electrocution and strangulation all rolled into one!

But we were still somewhat able to keep her entertained in various devices at that point- the exersaucer or the swing, or the like. But what came next- what we are dealing with now- is the full-fledged crawl. The crawl!!! And not only the crawl, but she can pull herself up willy-nilly on any object to a standing position thereby creating- literally- a whole new level of trouble for her to get into. The crawl happens fast. And it happens ever so quiet. So when you turn your back, and turn around again, she's made it into the foyer and pulled some of the books off of the bookshelf. Or she's found the one cord we haven't baby-proofed. Or she's dialed India on my cell phone- or at least the Indian take-out place up the street. Or neither, but you get my drift.

Now that she's mobile, she's not nearly as amenable to being kept one place by the exersaucer or the swing for any extended period of time. She's gotta move! So in the morning, when either my wife or myself has to care for her alone, while trying to get ourselves ready- it proves to be quite challenging. There's a lot of "keeping the ears open," and running from room to room so as to accomplish what we need to, yet not allowing her to find her way into the very things we try and keep her away from. There are only so many things you can block off with a baby gate. I've been looking through the baby-proofing aisles for some sort of tether-ball pole inspired leash sort of thing, where the most she could do is crawl around in circles. But oddly enough, I haven't found such a device. And when I am part of the team that designs it- my election to Parent of the Year will be a shoe-in.

P.S. I know it will only get worse when she starts walking... sigh.